Keep Calm & Play Animal Crossing

  I've had a very troubling past few weeks, I hope all of you have been doing well. I've been drinking way more than I should be, and in doing so, I've been incredibly cranky during my sober moments. I've also been abusing amphetamines and opiates, and it took watching Walk the Line (the Johnny Cash movie) to get me to realize how drug abuse can really hurt my friends. Although I'm not going quite cold turkey, I'm going to try to limit my drug and alcohol use for the time being in order to keep happier and healthier.
  Last night, I found out some troubling news about my boyfriend, which caused me to end things with him. I feel incredibly hurt and betrayed, and I was very tempted to drink my feelings away. I stayed sober for the evening, which was probably the best decision I could have made. I feel maybe I'll only drink for fun now, not to numb my problems. I've also very recently quit smoking cigarettes, which made my life hell. It does not make you look cool. It does not take the stress away. It only adds further stress into your life by becoming addicted to a literal cancer stick. I'm so glad I've had the courage to knock such bad habits, and I encourage all of you facing the same troubles I am to kick them, too.
  On a lighter note, I've been kind of obsessed with the Animal Crossing soundtrack. I found some great 8Tracks playlists (1, 2) featuring Animal Crossing songs, so I highly recommend you check them out. You can check out my latest Tumblr project though, the CalmingCorner, where I've posted both of them. It's a new idea of mine to create a "safe place" type Tumblr where people going through panic attacks, crying sessions, or general fits of anxiety or anger can go to calm down. There aren't many posts right now, but I hope to post more when I get home from school in order to help those in need.

  That was a lot of pictures, I know, but they were pretty, so shh. I've been going toward this light pink/blue pale vibe lately, and a lot of these pictures totally follow it. I love it, don't hate! (haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate...)  I don't really know how to close this post, so just... enjoy your weekend, lovelies!

I Have to Admit, It's Getting Better

  Hi folks! I must admit that my consistency on this blog is varying quite a bit. One week I'm here twice, and then I'm gone for a month. I must apologize for my lack of order when it comes to blogging. That being said, for the past week or so, I've been feeling fantastic. As some of you dedicated readers might know, I've been diagnosed with depression and have just been absolutely miserable in everything I do. I got a new therapist on Tuesday (my first in two whole years!) and it seemed that talking to her definitely helped. However, there seems to be something else on my mind that I feel as sparked the uprise in my pleasant behavior much more than any therapist ever could. That's right- Sam's found herself a boy. 

  I know that me talking about him here is probably creepy (he might be incredibly scared if he ever read this, oops), but oh well. It's my personal blog, I feel like I can blog.. well, personally here. And boys seem to be a very personal topic. I will spare him the indecency of sharing his name, but this boy has really made me happy. He even surprised me at work the other night by showing up out of the blue when we closed like Jake in Sixteen Candles.

It was so cheesy that I couldn't help but be absolutely swept off of my feet. We're going to dinner and the movies tomorrow, and I am beyond ecstatic. I'm already mentally figuring out what I'm going to wear, isn't that pathetic? For the first time in a very long time (maybe even ever) I feel myself constantly smiling, humming pleasant songs, and acting like how I feel a human being should act. I can't stop being happy, and I'm so, well, happy that I'm this happy. So thank you, nameless boy, for making my life a little less cynical.

Here's a happy little playlist to make you all as happy as I am (unfortunately 8Tracks is blocked so you all will have to look up the songs yourselves). I know these songs have been on a lot of my other playlists, but I love them, so I think they're worth a second listen.

I Have to Admit, It's Getting Better by SamanthaWarhol

1. "Mr. Blue Sky" by Electric Light Orchestra
2. "She's a Rainbow" by the Rolling Stones
3. "Love Grows (Where My Rosemary Goes)" by Edison Lighthouse
4. "Do You Believe in Magic?" by the Lovin' Spoonful
5. "I Only Want to Be With You" by the Bay City Rollers
6. "Short Skirt/Long Jacket" by Cake
7. "Da Ya Think I'm Sexy?" by Rod Stewart
8. "Getting Better" by the Beatles

Suburban Blues

  Lately I've been growing sick of living in the suburbs. It's not that I don't like the environment I'm in.. it's a little cold for my liking, but nothing too terrible. But it's the people I can't stand. In my town, our whole community is sports-based, and we're very patriotic about our teams. Our football team in particular has a large fan base, and if you don't like sports in this town, you're pretty much dead on arrival. Enter me: terrible at sports, simply doesn't care about patriotism, hates social interaction, and can hardly get enthusiastic about things I like, let alone things my town forces me to.
  I also feel like the education system, not just in my state in particular but in the entire country of the United States is heavily flawed. I have a feeling in a hundred or so years students will look back into their textbooks and think "wow, living then must have sucked. Those poor kids must have hated themselves." And yes, we do. A majority of people I know (yes, not just a select few, but a majority) of have had harmful thoughts because of the pressures of school. It's not even that we as students don't like learning, because I know I do. I just wish I could pick what I could learn about, as I know in the future I'm very unlikely to pursue a career based in geometry or chemistry. I should be able to choose classes that appeal to me, as I feel that is a basic human right. No student should ever be forced into classes they do not want to participate in. If I ask to switch out of a certain class or elect not to take one, I am criticized for not wanting to learn or not wanting to help myself. That's not the case; I simply do not find these specific subjects appealing and know that I will not choose to use them in my future. I feel as if I'm literally wasting my life away.
  Sorry for babbling, I just feel as if my school's environment is toxic. Everyone is harshly judgmental, and they feel as if everyone but themselves has a wrong opinion. Life is not about being wrong or right; it's about expressing your own opinion in the way you choose to express it. Be your own person; do not be a clone of everyone else around you. By being in such a ridiculously judgmental school, I feel as if I cannot express my opinion. I cannot be myself. And I hate every minute of it.

A Clockwork Pyscho

  The past few weeks, I've been having trouble keeping in touch with reality. Popping pills, smoking, tripping.. I don't know what is real anymore. I believe I've lost contact with the real world; I'd much prefer daydreaming in my own little world, where everything is happy in my mind. I see things that aren't there, I hear things that didn't sound, I feel false feelings.. I'm a mess, and I love it. I feel like a fluid cloud, bubbling and floating on to distances and realities that aren't there.

  Lately I've been into this early 90's shoegaze band named Slowdive. I'm not typically into them, but their songs "Alison," "Crazy For You," and especially their demo "Summer Daze" fill me with chills of nostalgia for a decade I barely belonged in. Summer Daze is especially haunting, and because I learned it on guitar yesterday, I feel even more freaky. Take a look at some of the songs that've been influencing me in a drug-filled craze this week:

Summer Daze by Slowdive (Demo)
Heroin by the Velvet Underground
Shangri-La by Electric Light Orchestra (The last minute or so of this song is so intense, it gives me chills. It is amazing when you're high!)
Maureen by the Beatles (Demo) (The link is to a video from my Youtube account :)
Vienna by Billy Joel
Music for the Funeral of Queen Mary/Title Music from a Clockwork Orange
In the Room Where You Sleep by Dead Man's Bones (This was in The Conjuring, and I've loved it ever since I saw it. Great movie, I highly recommend it)
Alison by Slowdive
The Court of the Crimson King by King Crimson
Life on Mars? by David Bowie

I Believe in ELO

  I'm going to come right out and say it- I've been taking a lot of drugs lately. I've been doing so well in school (high honors, go me!), I got a boyfriend, and my life is just.. great. It sounds awful, but everything is great thanks to drugs. I am NOT in the mood to be yelled at by people who say drugs are bad and all that, I know it's bad, but.. God, I have been on cloud nine lately. THAT BEING SAID, can we just discuss how much I love Electric Light Orchestra? ELO are this electronic rock borderline "pop" band that sounds like how I think space looks. They are fucking INCREDIBLE. Anyone who disagrees has not heard the magic of ELO. 

  I go through these little phases with bands I love where I take one of their songs, realize how great it is, listen to it 24/7, then get sick of it and repeat the cycle. Right now it's "Turn to Stone," and it is brilliant. Normally I'm not one to like commercial-sounding, upbeat pop songs, but "Turn to Stone" is so much more than that. Just listen to it and tell me the chorus doesn't make you want to jump up and sing at the top of your lungs. 

  Sing my school blocked 8tracks, here's a few links to some of my favorite ELO songs:

1. Mr. Blue Sky
2. Telephone Lines (This is in that Steve Buscemi scene of Billy Madison and it's what I think of whenever I hear it, ahha.)
3. Strange Magic
4. Turn to Stone
5. Don't Bring Me Down
6. And here's their Greatest Hits album in case you have a bunch of time to kill

 I've also been obsessing about space. For some reason whenever I'm high I just love talking about space and the solar system. Okay, enjoy and have a super duper day!

What a Day for a Daydream..

So there are a lot of bloggers who mainly post pictures of their wonderful outfits in real life. And since I don't have a tripod, I have to resort to using my shitty iPod's camera, which has actually been shattered. But today I found my old camera and I decided to take pictures of various things around the house. I am no photographer, so just enjoy the purposely-lame quality photographs I've taken. (: Also, I found some old pictures from around Christmas time of 2012, so enjoy those as well. (:

My dog looking confused as fuck, as usual

Sleeping in his bed like a king

That one time I thought I was cool and dyed my hair pink with chalk

I call this "naked." Because my bed is naked. Heh, get it?.. No? Okay, carry on.

Life-sized Robert and Jimmy, James Dean in the corner. 

This cute little furball thing I love. I don't really know

Closet! My favorite 60's shirt is peeking through, the orange, red, & purple one (: Grooovy

Newly dyed hair :) Black underneath, blonde on top.

Look at this soap, its so cute! It has a little ladybug inside of it, aww.

Dream catcher. 

Craft corner!

Once again, my beautiful lunchbox. 

Where the magic happens. AKA my flower crowns.

MY BABY

Polaroids of Pattie Boyd, Robert Plant, Jimmy Page, a record player, and Friar Park

I don't.. know

A few pins (the rest were on a vest god knows where) and my homemade mod RAF roundel necklace, and some loooverly lipstick

My uniform. Workin' for the MAN

eos chapstick are my obsessions, and my bootyful hand-painted by moi bass guitar

My dad has a beautiful Kramer poster in his bar

And he also has cool pins too woo

His record player, and a giant gingerbread man

Old aspirin dispenser from the 30's 

And a Pulp Fiction one too C:

I think this photo just describes me

Oh and bad news 8tracks has been blocked on my school computer :( So here's a playlist while Im on my home one enjoy xoxo

Kooky Spooky Candy from itsamodmodworld on 8tracks Radio.

1. "I Want Candy" by The Strangeloves
2. "Pictures of Lily" by The Who
3. "Oh, Yoko!" by John Lennon
4. "She's a Rainbow" by The Rolling Stones
5. "Boys Don't Cry" by The Cure
6. "These Days" by Nico
7. "I Go to Pieces" by Peter and Gordon
8. "Technicolour Dreams" by Status Quo
9. "Please, Please, Please, Let Me Get What I Want" by The Smiths
10. "Cherry Bomb" by The Runaways