Thursday, December 12, 2013

Where is My Mind?

  Lately my mind has been a complete mess. I don't know what I'm doing, how I'm feeling, or what I want anymore. I've stopped taking drugs (as frequently, at least) and I've been feeling bloody miserable ever since. So I took some today, which I do not regret at all.. I feel pretty damn great. Only thing is my eyes keep bugging out of my skull and I have the feeling my friends are aware that I'm on something. Lovely. Anyways, enough drug talk, as I can tell no one even reads my posts anymore due to the excessive drug rants. Well I'm sorry folks, but this is a blog, meaning this should be about my life. And right now in my life, I've lost my mind.

  I'm going through a lot of difficult thoughts, mainly the thought of liking girls. Now, for about four years or so now, I've embraced liking girls and am not ashamed of it whatsoever. I'm not completely out about it, but the only reason I'm not is because people in my school don't care enough to spread that fact around. Eh, their loss. ;) The point is, I like girls. And the problem is, I have a boyfriend.
  I'm not sure what exactly to do, but I'm planning on breaking up with him as soon as possible. But I'm freaking out about it. My entire group of friends literally revolves around me being friends with him, so I'm hoping he won't take it harshly. Either way, my mind is racing with horrible thoughts. And I don't know how to make it stop.

1. "Where is My Mind?" by the Pixies
2. "Sad Dream" by Sky Ferreira
3. "You and I" by Silver Apple
4. "Lights Changing Colour" by Star
5. "All the Young Dudes" by Mott the Hoople
6. "Gamma Ray" by Beck
7. "Trouble" by Cat Stevens

Sunday, December 8, 2013

This is the End

  Beautiful friend. This is the end, my only friend, the end. Of all elaborate plans, the end. Of everything that stands, the end. No safety or surprise, the end. I'll never look into your eyes, again..

  God, I love the Doors. But enough of that, haha. I've felt this hauntingly lonesome feeling all weekend, mixed in with a wave of nostalgia from about two or so years ago. It's a weird time for me, is what I'm trying to say.. I've been listening to a lot of music, and maybe if you listen to that same music, you'll get a sense of what I'm trying to say...

  1. "Lonesome Town" by Ricky Nelson
  2. "Love Will Tear Us Apart" by Joy Division
  3. "The Killing Moon" by Echo and the Bunnymen
  4. "Head over Heels" by Tears for Fears
  5. "How to Disappear Completely" by Radiohead
  6. "The End of the World" by Skeeter Davis
  7. "Summer Daze" by Slowdive
  8. "The End" by the Doors

  I've also been watching a lot of movies this weekend. I watched the infamous Donnie Darko for the second time in two years, and it left me with this strange void of emptiness inside. That's where the songs by Joy Division, Echo and the Bunnymen, and Tears for Fears come from. That movie has a lovely soundtrack by the way, something I didn't notice the first time around. It's also a wonderful movie for those of you who haven't seen it, so I highly recommend that.
  I also watched SLC Punk for the first time, and I really liked it. It had that perfect mixture of darkness and a quirky attitude to instantly make me like it. Hell, I even dyed my hair blue today, mainly from main character Stevo's influence (that, and because I've wanted blue hair for a solid year now, ahha). I really recommend that movie as well.
  "End of the World" by Skeeter Davis is from Girl, Interrupted, which I didn't watch this weekend, but have seen enough times that I'm able to tie it in with these other movies I watched. It's definitely in my top 10 favorite movies of all time, and I HIGHLY RECOMMEND IT!! Seriously though, it's just a purely wonderful film. 

  That's really it folks, but I hope everyone is having a lovely December so far, and I really do hope from the bottom of my heart that you all aren't having a depressing holiday season like me! xx

Also rest in peace, Johnny boy! The world misses you xox

Thursday, December 5, 2013

Candy Colored Clouds

  Hi everyone, this is a poor excuse for a blog post, but I thought I'd just show you a few things that I've enjoyed recently. The first is a few images, so enjoy these:

I've also had some songs on my mind that you all might enjoy:

  1. "Hope" by Klaatu // when the song kicks in (and believe me, you will know when it kicks in) you're rushed with this overwhelmingly intense rush of power and emotion that to this day blows my mind how the hell they captured it into a song
  2. "My Girl" by the Temptations // how can anyone not like this song? Every time I listen to it, I feel so happy inside and nostalgia for a time period I never lived in washes over me
  3. "You Get What You Give" by the New Radicals // although this song is a little bit newer than music I typically listen to, I'm a really big fan of this song. Plus it reminds me of my childhood, hearing it on the radio
  4. "Everybody's Talkin'" by Harry Nilsson // this song is soft and pretty, yet deep and soulful at the same time, making it an instant favorite in my mind
  5. "Village Green" by the Kinks // a lesser known Kinks tune, this personal favorite of mine sounds so different from a lot of other typical songs from the time period that it's hard not to love it, honestly. It sounds like a medieval party to me, which is something I think everyone can groove to
  6. "Midnight Confessions" by the Grass Roots // this song was one of my favorites in the eighth grade, and I forgot about it up until now. It's so big yet at the same time so small, as it confuses my mind and makes me feel all warm and bubbly inside. Check it out

AND FINALLY check out some groovy links that've kept me occupied for the past week or so.
Fantastic Elvis art collection from Rookie
Klaus Voormann's artwork from his Hamburg days with the Beatles
Beatles News
Today in Beatles History...

Have a lovely day you lovely people xx

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

Technicolor Dreams

This picture makes me so happy by the way, I just LOVE this watch

  I've been freaking out lately due to school and whatnot, so I figured I'd vent in a blog post. As you all know, I hate the American education system, and think it's highly flawed. So I've been spending a ridiculously large amount of time on the internet lately in an attempt to calm myself down. In doing so I found a band on Spotify (follow mine here :) called Sweet that were dominant in the mid-seventies glam scene. They sound like an offspring of Cheap Trick and the Bay City Rollers to me, and I really like them. Plus, look at their outfits:
They're so glamtastic, it hurts.
  Seriously, who can't love these guys and their outfits? I really like their sound, and especially their look. It got me thinking about how much I love sixties and seventies technicolor (even though in the seventies technicolor wasn't being used as much, when it was used, it was FAB), so here's a tribute to the songs and images that've inspired me within the past 24 hours.

  1. "Ballroom Blitz" by Sweet
  2. "I Only Wanna Be With You" by the Bay City Rollers
  3. "Just Got Back" by Cheap Trick
  4. "Hi Hi Hi" by Paul McCartney & Wings
  5. "Saturday Night" by the Bay City Rollers
  6. "Fox on the Run" by Sweet
  7. "Blister in the Sun" by the Violent Femmes
  8. "Float On" by Modest Mouse
  9. "No Sugar Tonight" by the Guess Who
  10. "Ashes to Ashes" by David Bowie

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Young Americans

  How was everyone's Thanksgiving? Good? Well, excellent. I despise Thanksgiving with a burning passion, but if you had a good one, well, good for you. I'm typing this back on a Tuesday (we had Monday off because the teachers had some meeting or something like that, so it feels like a Monday to me but in all actuality it is a Tuesday morning), in my homeroom, cringing at the obnoxious females that occupy the space next to me. It's one thing to be annoyingly giggly and loud and rude and stuck up, but do you really have to do it next to me? No. The answer is no. 
  Sorry I'm so grumpy, I just hate this stupid American lifestyle. Thanksgiving, see your family, pretend you're thankful because some Native Americans and some pilgrims supposedly had a feast together (although the real history of Thanksgiving is rather gruesome, I'd highly suggest looking into it). I just think it's all pretty stupid. Around this time last year I was longing to be back in London. And this year, I feel the same exact way. I'd do anything to be back in Liverpool though.. 
  All throughout the few days off they gave my school for Thanksgiving "break" I was on my laptop looking up plane ticket prices. I want to run away to Liverpool, be free.. unfortunately though, that cannot be a reality for several reasons...
  1. Some airlines won't let me fly alone without parental permission due to my age
  2. The only way to purchase a ticket for a flight is online through my debit card, which I'm sure my parents could easily track
  3. It's kind of expensive for a ticket, which I don't really mind, but most of my money is in the bank, and in order to take that money out, I need parental permission
  4. I'd have to convert all my dollars to pounds, essentially losing value
  5. I'd have nowhere to stay and so I'd have to pay for a hotel, losing even more money
  6. I couldn't get a job because I'm an immigrant, so I'd have to apply for a work visa
  7. All this complicated crap
  The point is, I can't run away to Liverpool, and that makes me sad. Looks like I'm stuck being a young American.